Andrew Dilnot has just reported on how much the elderly will have to pay for their care in the future. I have read this report and I cannot see any reference to dogs (or any other domestic pets for that matter). I have therefore calculated how I should prepare for my old age.
Firstly you have to know how old you really are. The nonsense about 7 human years for every dog year is SOOOO outdated. Have a look at this chart to find out your age. I’m 57. If I retire at 65 then I will be about 10 – say 2 years’ time. The average life expectancy for a Labrador (depressing isn’t it) is 12.6 years. This means I have 2.6 years to look forward to in retirement. Assuming I work 9 hours a week (napkins, toilet roll recycling and washing machine filling) at the National Minimum Biscuit Rate (5.93 biscuits an hour) that means I get 53 biscuits a week. Over the next two years this is 5,550 biscuits. In retirement I will only need about 50% of the biscuits I have now therefore I will need to have saved up 3,380 biscuits. In order to make this work I need to set aside 61% of my biscuits, leaving me only 21 biscuits a week to live on now.
Alternatively, I shall ask Ian and the Rose and Crown to keep feeding me!
Don’t forget to come and see me The Old Cider House, Quantock Hills