Dr Fox and Mr Ferrety

I have received a number of e-mails concerning Liam Fox and my relationship with my good friend Ian, especially since the Sir Gus O’Doggel report has been published. I have no idea who Mr Ferrety is – is he like one of those animals on the TV that compare the market dot com?

First, I want to make it absolutely clear that neither me nor Dr Fox woz the person that did the Pepsi Chart Show. I have no idea wot Pepsi is (or a chart show for that matter). Ian said it is a fizzy drink. I don’t like fizzy drinks as the bubbles go up my nose, although I am allowed a little slurp of champagne at Christmas in my bowl if it has been de-gassed (champagne, not bowl).

A number of people have noticed that Ian accompanies me most of the time both on trips at home and abroad. In an attempt to clarify the issue, Ian is an unpaid advisor. He has accompanied me on 37 occasions to the Rose and Crown this year together with a number of other pubs in Nether Stowey. Ian has accompanied me abroad on 8 occasions. At no time woz he privy to any of my thoughts or any matters of canine security.

I do live rent free at Ian’s house and he feeds me. At no time did the cost of these ‘accommodations’ come out of the public purse – they all came out of Lynne’s purse. All my biscuits were earned for work undertaken in house at the National Minimum Biscuit Rate, save for those provided by the local pubs (Charles, Bill and Rob for who I carry out some minor public relations tasks). The basket swapping woz only because I sometimes use a different bed when I am on holiday and has nothing to do with blanketmentary expenses. As you are well aware I am no longer allowed near any more duck houses!

Save Ripley

I hope that this clarifies the issues and that the press will stop hounding me.

Don’t forget to support Ripley by clicking onto the Pedigree website

Want a place to stay next week during half term? What about The Old Cider House?

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About Blog Administrator

We write a number of blogs for different reasons. For: Law - contact Ian Pearson 07531 852 229 Dog - contact Ozy The Old Cider House - contact Lynne 01278 732228
This entry was posted in Adopt a Dog, Employment Law, Travelling to France with your dog. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Dr Fox and Mr Ferrety

  1. Dave Harrison says:

    Don’t trust this dog. On numerous occasions he has been spotted trespassing in the hallowed grounds of ye sacred porch. Suspected bread and cake crumb pilferer. Crime is crime. As for ferrets, might it be the non-native moustacius spindlum ferretus that has been spotted in Stowey, believed to originate from the Antipodes? Builds multiple burrows in unsuitable terrain? Hides in hedgii leylandii? I digress it’s just your name … Ozy … it carries currently unsavoury connotations. One last note – I owe your butler thank you pints for services appreciated. Right, I am surrounded by Swedes and Dutchies and am about to become airborne. Bbbbring me beer in a cold plastic cup.

    • Just because you are away abroad does not mean the libel and slander laws do not apply. However, if you buy my Butler beer I am sure a lot of the issues can be forgotten about. As I have not transcribed the Dog Bribery Act 2011 yet, this is probably okay. Ozy

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