New Law and Other Stuff

Whilst my 50 Shades of Black blog is being edited by Hannah (a girl wot has actually read the Grey book) a quick catch up on a few things:

LAW

The National Minimum Biscuit Rate goes up from 1st October to £6.19 biscuits per hour. Make sure your owners are aware of this. In addition, Ian has finally managed to finish typing the Canine Rights Act 1998 and these are both available for viewing on my www.law4dogs.co.uk site. Some may suggest that Ian has too much time on his paws, but he insists that he only types my dictation when he is on a train or pretending to listen to Lynne.

COMPETITION

Thank you to all of you who entered my Win a Ozy Mug competition. All you had to do was to follow me on Twitter or retweeet my competition messages. Ian wrote all the names on a bit of card and the winner is Sarah Spall. Ted and Jonty – well done. There’s a picture of Ted and Jonty on our Pinterest page.

QUESTIONS

I have had loads of questions and I will answer all of these a few at a time. Here are the first two:

Dear Ozy,

Where are the 39 Steps?

Roger from Melbourne

Dear Roger from Melbourne

Wot a good question. I have had a look at Dogipedia (where’s the ‘a’ gone?) the site written and edited by dogs.

Firstly I needed to understand what woz meant by Steps. I woz a bit confused and thort you meant LisaClaireFayeLee, and  “H” of the group Steps – but there are only five of them. It woz a tragedy when I said goodbye when they split up and I stomped off. Words are not enough, but you know I’m not one for sorrow and our relationship is better best forgotten. But now we’re here and now and after the love has gone this group woz the last thing on my mind. [editor’s note – spot all the songs and Ozy will send you a prize. Click on the Leave a Comment link below].

Then I found out that the 39 steps is a book by John Buchan. This is a story about a man called Richard Hannay who discovers a plot to murder the Greek Prime Minister by the Germans (this seems to quite a contemporary scenario if you ask me, given the amount of money the Germans are giving Greece at the moment). Some nasty men try to bump Hannay off so he goes to Scotland (where I woz last week – I wonder if it rained all the time when he woz there?). Then he goes all over the place and ends up in Kent. The book woz written while Buchan woz ill and convalescing in Broadstairs – so that’s where they are.

Dear Ozy

I do not like pasta, but I like spaghetti bolognese as spaghetti is not pasta. However, I have now been told that spaghetti is pasta. Is this true as I cannot believe it? As a world-wise traveller I would appreciate your thoughts on this.

Many thanks

Ron of Didcot

Dear Ron of Didcot,

This is not as daft a question as it sounds. Most pastas are just pastas. For example, lasagne is just lasagne, macaroni is just macaroni. However, spaghetti can be loads of things. It can be a western, with Clint Eastwood, or it can be a junction near Birmingham. It can also be a piece of computer code (the following is an example – 10= 0 20 i = i + 1 30 PRINT i; ” squared = “; i * I 40 IF i >= 10 THEN GOTO 60 50 GOTO 20 60 PRINT “Program Completed.” 70 END).

Most importantly, in 1957 Panorama showed the spaghetti harvest being picked in Switzerland. As spaghetti is the only pasta to grow on trees it must be different from any other type of pasta and therefore this is why you like it.

DON’T FORGET – Friday’s blog. Not for the faint hearted, a bit spicy and lots of bad prose.

For further information contact me at The Old Cider House, Nether Stowey

Luz, Ozy

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About Blog Administrator

We write a number of blogs for different reasons. For: Law - contact Ian Pearson 07531 852 229 Dog - contact Ozy The Old Cider House - contact Lynne 01278 732228
This entry was posted in 50 Shades of Grey, Dog Friendly, Fifty Shades of Grey, Human Rights Act, Law4Dogs, National Minimum Wage, Pet Blogs, The 39 Steps. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to New Law and Other Stuff

  1. Roger says:

    Dear Ozy
    Thanks for telling me where the 39 steps are although following your clues I must confess I’m still looking. I am, however, quite excited by your competition as Steps are my favourite band and are rumoured to be headlining Glastonbury next year. My entry is: tragedy, stomp, last thing on my mind, when I said goodbye, words are not enough, one for sorrow, better best forgotten, here and now and after the love has gone. I’m rather hoping the prize is a ticket to Glastonbury as I’ve just spent 2 hours trying to purchase one! You may wish to give out advice in the future on how to get through to the ticket office from Nether Stowey!

    Roger

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