I have been asked to vote for my local dog warden. It appears that all areas now have to have a directly elected Dog and Cat Commissioner (DCC). Their purpose? ‘To ensure the animal welfare needs of their local communities are met as effectively as possible, bringing communities closer to the Dog Warden Service (DWS), building confidence in the system and restoring trust’ – or that’s wot it said on the Dog Office website.
These DCCs will make key decisions on lost and found dogs, strays, enforcing picking up poo, supporting ‘Good Dog’ schemes (honestly – look at the Sedgemoor DC website) and ensuring all dogs are identified. In addition these new DCCs will ‘listen’ and bring a ‘public face’ to the DWS.
Quite frankly, I have no idea wot this is all about. Nothing has come through the letterbox about it, or if it has, then I accidently chewed it up without reading it. I asked Ian to look it up on the computer thing (although dogs with older owners probably can’t do this), and he said there are three candidates.
The first is a Conservative candidate who says he will make sure that owners take responsibility for their own dogs whilst protecting the most vulnerable dogs and cats in society (having said that, I am yet to meet a vulnerable cat). The Labour woman thinks that all dogs should be paid for by the state and the Liberal Democat person thinks dogs are lovely and cats are cuddly.
I wanted to vote UKIP as I had a look at their manifesto and this says, “UKIP believes all animals that share our planet deserve to be treated compassionately by humans and should be spared unnecessary suffering.” However, I have been told that all animals are going to be taken away from members of UKIP due to their right wing leanings and the fact they don’t like French or German dogs – especially in Rotherham.
Not surprisingly, not many dogs voted for the new DCCs and cats couldn’t get their heads round having to do something that they were told. I spoiled my paper – not on purpose but when I was trying to put the bit of paper in the ballot box it got a bit soggy and woz so full of teeth marks that it woz impossible to read.
Next time I might stand myself!
If you want to discuss how the Government wastes both their time and our money on pointless elections and stuff give my owners a call on 01278 732228 or at firstname.lastname@example.org and stay at the UK’s most dog friendly accommodation.