It has baffled scientists for decades but I may have discovered ‘Dark Matter’ in my basket. It seems that 27% of the mass of the Universe is a mystery, but must exist due to the speed of rotation of the Galaxy.
After spending $2 billion and getting Ian to take a few photos with his Kodak on ‘sports’ mode I think I have the answer.
Most of the Dark Matter is, in fact, my fur. This tends to fall out – mainly on the lighter coloured carpets in the house, but some is retained in my bed. The rest is made up of half eaten charcoal biscuits, bits of mud from the Quantocks and fox poo.
The Dark Matter seems to be benign and hasn’t had any adverse effect on Derek the Rat or Pierre Bear.
So, if you’re Professor Brian Cox or someone else who is reely clever and was in a band (and I’m thinking of Brian May or Myleene Klass here) then come and visit me at The Old Cider House