I woz born a free dog in the village of Huntsworth, near Bridgwater. My life woz idyllic, playing with my brothers and sisters without a care in the World – then that all changed.
I woz approached by a couple of people wot said they owned a bed and breakfast in the Quantock Hills and offered me a high paid job helping in the guesthouse – clearing tables and stuff. It woz an offer that I culdn’t refuse, so I packed up my blanket and bowl and followed them to the Quantocks. Little did I know that they were crooks and I woz told never to mention my free life in Huntsworth again.
I woz transported to Nether Stowey in a Ford Galaxy and immediately put into a collar and lead, something that I have had to wear ever since. From then on my life has been one of toil and hardship. I even have to eat my food out of a bowl on the floor!
The first thing they made me do woz learn how to do stuff in the guesthouse; clearing napkins and tablecloths after breakfast, putting pillowslips into the washing machine and doing ‘spillage cleaning’ jobs wen something fell off of the kitchen counter onto the floor (wot isn’t too bad I suppose).
I also had to be nice to other dogs wot visit The Old Cider House and I am sure that it woz my hard work wot got them to be the winner of the Kennel Club’s best B&B in the UK award a few years ago. It’s all well and good being one of the most dog friendly places in the South West, but I don’t have much time to myself.
I have set up a website for other dogs wot are also suffering called www.law4dogs.co.uk and I am hoping to be freed in the near future.
I have heard that they are going to make a film of my life. I think Morgan Freedog would play me well as an older dog and perhaps Brad Pitbull could also star in it.
So it’s back to the grind…
If you want to come and help rescue me, then I’m at The Old Cider House, Nether Stowey, Quantocks, Quantock Hills, Somerset – dog friendly bed and breakfast accommodation.