Ian has decided we all need to go on a diet.
Well, actually, Ian needs to go on a diet as he spent most of the Christmas and New Year period in the pub with his mates and Uncle Biscuit drinking loads of Stowey Ale beer!
So I have been doing a bit of research to find out wot diet would be good for a Labrador:
This is based on a points’ system. No foods are banned and you daily and weekly ‘Smartpoints®’ and ‘Fitpoints’. For example, my normal kibble would be my daily allowance and I could have some Bonios each week with some chews. The Fitpoints are easy as I go on a walk every day. This looks like it might be a good thing to go on as it’s what I normally do.
This replaces two meals with a milkshake and then I can have a sensible meal in the evenings. Some snacks are allowed. However, the real drawback is that one of the shake flavours is chocolate and dogs must NEVER eat chocolate. Probably not good for dogs.
This is where you eat cabbage soup. HORRIBLE
This involves staving the body of carbohydrates. It’s protein-rich diet with no restrictions on fat. This sounds FANTASTIC. I can go without biscuits and just eat meat.
5:2 Fast Diet
This is where you can eat as much as you like on five days but on two days you have to eat less. This sometimes happens when Ian forgets to feed me. It sounds like it might be alright, but one of the side-effects is bad breath – WOT am I talking about, I’ve always got bad breath!
NHS weight loss plan
This is really boring. Wot you do is just eat less and move more. However, it’s wot most diets are.
So all in all I prefer the Atkins diet – but first I must work out my BMI (Body Mass Index). To do this I need to take my weight and height and Ian pushes some buttons on his little machine and …. WHAT THE …
Ozy the Labrador